I rarely post and am mostly a lurker, but i can say from probably many others like me that you will be missed deeply! I'm always sad to see ones i consider to be one of the backbone of a community go. You are an awesome example of what can be done with ones life after the org. May you have peace and find an abundance of joy and exquisit delight in THIS life. Peace brother!!
Perversion of a truth
JoinedPosts by Perversion of a truth
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60
Goodbye JW net
by snare&racket inforgive me for indulging in a goodbye but it would feel wrong not to,.
i hope the discussions and atmosphere here do not change for it is a bubbling brew of doubt, bravery and sincere hunger for answers.
these are healthy ingrediants for humans and especially for a jehovah's witness.. this forum offers not just the ability to ask without consequence, but it also offers the means to be real.
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Reasons for staying In?
by objectivetruth ini have spoken to %90 of mymfriends & family.. and i have found that there are 3 basic reasons why people stay.. .
1. god has always had an organization.
the organization has never been perfect, but he has always had one.. 2. i know a lot of things are wrong, bit where else can i go?
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Perversion of a truth
"They use the bible as a contortionist uses his body."
Such a great line cause of how true it is... Gonna have to remember and use that one.
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Where in the greek scriptures does it say that the preaching work had been finished in the first century?
by Perversion of a truth injust what the title says.
i can't seem to remember or find it.
thanks!
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Perversion of a truth
Just what the title says. I can't seem to remember or find it. Thanks!!
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What I really hate....
by Perversion of a truth inis that i was born into this cult, taught and believed that i was going to live forever, , that i was never going to have to die.
now i am in my mid 30's realizing that this life is all there is and that after that i am dead forever and i am terrified.
i don't want this to be all there is, , i don't want to just live a few years on this beautiful planet and then become non existent forever!
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Perversion of a truth
Thank you all kindly for your replys and suggestions. I have tried meditation (wait is this against the JW rules?? lol) and actually Claire Weeks per LV101's recommendation has helped quite dramatically, , I found her stuff awhile ago. I've been meaning to get into a routine of meditation every day as I have heard it works wonders for not only anxiety but for creativity as well (not to mention other benefits). Maybe this bout of anxiety will help me get that routine underway.
I had real bad anxiety around this time last year, , was having some stomach issues and ended up being sick for many months and was thinking I was dying. It took me months to finally get my anxiety under control and to get back to where I was feeling normal again and finding enjoyment in life. I have been doing well for months until recently when my anxiety started to flair up again. Today is actually the first day that I have felt a little better. I have been going on walks/slow jogs for the past 5 days in a row to get my heart rate up and to work at combating this anxiety. I also have some anxiety meds that help take the edge off when I start panicking...
Thank you all again for your replies, I beleive that it has helped me calm down and realize that this is only anxiety and not something more sinister.
BTW, for those who have never had anxiety this bad or haven't experienced it with a friend or family, it really is the worse thing, , especially when it is health anxiety and you feel like you are dying. The anxiety attacks soon become to where you are in a perpetual state of anxiety, always worying and not being able to enjoy anything, , and I mean anything. Nothing seems to take your mind off of your anxiety and the thoughts racing through your mind, and all you feel like doing is just laying in bed all day long. It really has been the worse thing that I have ever experienced and wouldn't wish it on my worse enemy. Fortunately so far this time it hasn't been as bad as last time, , and I hope I hope I hope that I am already on the mend back to normality. Currently I am relaxing in bed (yes I said relaxing lol) sipping on a cup of chamomile tea trying to not think about anything anxiety related. In all honesty the last bout that I had with anxiety which lasted around 6 months, , there is a good chance I may have taken my life if I wasn't so damned afraid of dying, , I was that miserable with no perceived way out... So I guess there are benefits to fearing death.
Thank you all again for your responses, I do very much apprecaite it!!!
Much Love!!
~Perversion of a Truth~ -
23
What I really hate....
by Perversion of a truth inis that i was born into this cult, taught and believed that i was going to live forever, , that i was never going to have to die.
now i am in my mid 30's realizing that this life is all there is and that after that i am dead forever and i am terrified.
i don't want this to be all there is, , i don't want to just live a few years on this beautiful planet and then become non existent forever!
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Perversion of a truth
Thank you so much for all of your replies. Yeah, I kinda wonder about the afterlife also. There is something deep down that says that this life can't be all just for nothing, , that there has to be more to the story... I hope. If not I intend to try to enjoy this life as much as possible! I guess the one thing that was nice about being a JW is that I would have died ignorantly blissful to the most likely fact that this life is all there is....
Yeah, I've thought a few times about the exact location of my heart, , and the pain/discomfort that I feel is more in my frontal shoulder, , of course anxiety isn't one to be reasoned with... The pain i've had has been going on intermittently for the past few weeks... for the past five days i've been going on walks/slow jogs everyday trying to get my heart rate up since I live a mostly sedintary lifestyle... I sure hope that the pain is just anxiety or just something else benign unrelated to my heart. I would say pray for me, , lol, but I know most of you including myself don't beleive in any of that anymore.... Thank you guys, , love you all! -
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What I really hate....
by Perversion of a truth inis that i was born into this cult, taught and believed that i was going to live forever, , that i was never going to have to die.
now i am in my mid 30's realizing that this life is all there is and that after that i am dead forever and i am terrified.
i don't want this to be all there is, , i don't want to just live a few years on this beautiful planet and then become non existent forever!
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Perversion of a truth
Is that I was born into this cult, taught and believed that I was going to live forever, , that I was never going to have to die. Now I am in my mid 30's realizing that this life is all there is and that after that I am dead forever and I am terrified. I don't want this to be all there is, , I don't want to just live a few years on this beautiful planet and then become non existent forever!
I have pretty severe anxiety, , anxiety that at times rules my life. The people on the anxiety forums call it more specifically "Heath Anxiety", which I guess you could say is a form of Hypocondria. I've only dealt with this severe anxiety since I have found out TTATT. The last few weeks I've been having chest pains on the left side of my chest, , more tightness and discomfort then pain really. I have also been having pains in my left arm during this time. I am terrified that it might be related to my heart and that I could have a heart attack and die any day. My wife says that she's pretty sure it's just anxiety, , and there is a part of me that agrees. I don't have any spare $$ at the moment and can't afford a trip to the ER for $1000+. I actually went to the ER about a year ago and they did blood test and performed an EKG but said my heart was fine, , but I am so worried and scared... I don't want to die. :-( We get full health coverage in about a month and a half... So I guess I will just wait till then since I can have a whole slough of tests run for only a $5 copay.... I guess here's to hoping I don't die in the next few days/weeks!!! -
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Memorial Attendance: The Single Most Impactful TTATT "Witness" to Family and Friends
by AMNESIANO inanyone who has awakened to ttatt and conscientiously left the organization--especially a once-prominent individual from a prominent multi-generational tribe of jws-- after decades of devout, high-profile "serve-us," who continues to put in an annual appearance at the memorial thoroughly subverts and undermines, by this one act, any hope s/he may entertain that his/her departure will stir family or former friends to question the whole watchtower bamboozle.
by this one concession s/he assigns him-/herself by every single jw to their handy and dimissive purgatory: the "spiritually-weak.".
nothing blasts a louder, clearer, and more deliberate message to the jws who personally knew you and those familiar with your jw bona fides that you are not merely "not making the meetings" or "spiritually-weak" but that there is a conscientious reason you have rejected the entire watchtower society life than choosing to forego what they know you know to be their one-and-only holy and sacred event of the year, the lord's evening meal.
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Perversion of a truth
I've talked with my mom and a few old JW friends and have told them I am not going to meetings and that I don't know if I even believe in Gogofmayjehovag (lol, , sorry... god) anymore. They don't know how I truly feel, , and that that is that I know that the JW's are a cult and the governing body is a bunch of bullshit, and that in my heart I am a true apostate...
But after reading your post I have admitly decided I will not be attending the memorial tomorrow. It's funny, , cause I haven't talked to my mom in over a month, , or my brother (the only two left in my family that are still brainwashed...big time), , and both called today... My brother I answered cause I thought well enough that he wouldn't ask the question, , and of course he didn't.. thank god... lol. But my mom called and I let it roll to voicemail, , cause I just knew she was going to remind me and ask if I was going to the memorial tomorrow. I am sure that I will receive a call in a day or two, , from my mom to "catch up" and of course ask if I attended the memorial. Which of course I will respond with, , "No mom... Why would I go? I am an athiest"... I wonder if my mom will talk to me even less after this conversation. Can't stop me from being what I am.
Anyway, Thank you for the great thinking post. Assisting me with a decision that wasn't just baised off of faith. -
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New face same Miss.Fit ...had trouble with my account had to reregister. suggestions for new avatar?
by MissFit insorry for any confusion.
i could not get in using my password it kept saying wrong password.
i tryed resetting password and got error message.
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Perversion of a truth
I like LisaRose's Avatar also
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New face same Miss.Fit ...had trouble with my account had to reregister. suggestions for new avatar?
by MissFit insorry for any confusion.
i could not get in using my password it kept saying wrong password.
i tryed resetting password and got error message.
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Perversion of a truth
You could do an Avatar of a close-up of your actual eye, , peering into your soul.... oh wait, , that is what mine is!! :-)
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Overwhelming Fear of Death
by Perversion of a truth indo any of the posters on here deal with this?
i do, and i hate it.
people (mostly my brother) tells me to not fear death and just to enjoy life and so on, but that doesn't seem to help any.
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Perversion of a truth
Greetings. Do any of the posters on here deal with this? I do, and I hate it. People (mostly my brother) tells me to not fear death and just to enjoy life and so on, but that doesn't seem to help any. Since I don't believe in god now I fear that almost for sure that when I die that that is it forever... I don't know what it is, whether it is the love of life or what, , but to imagine dying and not exisiting forever is such a scary thought to me, , I don't want to die forever. Does anyone else feel this way?
I am currently in my early 30's so I (hopefully) still have some living to do, but I can't stop thinking how quickly life has gotten me to where I am now, , and knowing that I'll wake up tomorrow and be old and getting close to death. Any help or suggestions on how to overcome this fear or at least accept it or cope with it would be much appreciated!